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I read a really impressive article that one elder journalist wrote.
> PERFECT
It was about the hidden causes of the sunken ship Sewol and what we should improve.
> PERFECT
To conclude, this accident is a shameful portrait of our society.
> "Shameful portrait" is a very artistic way to say it.. GOOD JOB
*The incident and the message is really sad but I am applauding the way you express your thoughts on the matter.*
He asked back us if you were the captain or the crew of Sewol, were you surely able to act different with them.
> He asked us back: "If you were the captain or the crew of Sewol, are you sure that you will act differently from them?"
The point is that lack of obeying regulations and duties is already rampant in Korean society.
> VERY GOOD............ the lack of rules and regulations and the neglect of duties are already rampant............
Many authorities neglect their manual and as a result, a lot of big and small accidents happened.
> VERY GOOD ..................................................... as a result, a lot of accidents, big and small, happened. ------------- *take note of the punctuations*
However, we have not made an effort to improve it much.
> VERY GOOD
The first cause of Sewol is in the crews and the owner company.
> The first reason for the SEWOL accident is in the crews and the owner of the company.
And we must remember that the second and more Sewol can happen if our society will not improve our general awareness and value about safety.
> VERY GOOD especially on the second half of this complex sentence.
......................... And we must remember that there may be more succeeding accidents similar to SEWOL if our....... |
